My mom is fabulous. As I labor here and not work, she is home cleaning my house. Organizing and cleaning. Because when I called her last night to ask frantically if almonds were poisonous to dogs (because the damn bag of them burst and flew everywhere and my cable and internet were down, having been mowed to pieces earlier in the day), and had a mini-breakdown on the phone about how things are just awful right now, she asked if I wanted her come visit this weekend while DH is out of town.
I jumped for joy.
Now, understand, my mom doesn't coddle me. She gives me space and frequently makes me clean up my own messes, but she's always been there for me as support, a shoulder to cry on, and occasionally with a loan of money or time.
I will never forget the weekend I had food poisoning and DH was visiting family (mind you, this was when we were dating, so he wasn't living with me at the time), and she was coming to visit and I woke up at 2 am feeling queasy and again at 4 am at which point I started vomitting and having bad diarrhea. I called her at 6 am and when she answered, all I could do was sniffle and wail, "Mommy, I don't feel good!" And she was there four hours later (it's a four hour drive) with Immodium, ginger ale, crackers, and most importantly, Emetrol. I was running a fever at that point and was having weird dreams and was stark naked because I was so hot, and she took it in stride and took care of me.
Now I need some help and she's free, so she drove out this morning and sent me off to work while she helps us out. I appreciate her willingness to help and her willingness to step back and let me make my own decisions. I appreciate her support and her non-judgement of my choices. I appreciate her willingness to love my husband and her nice nature.
I know I should probably feel badly about her driving out and cleaning my house, but frankly, I'm too relieved and grateful to mind. And it gives me a chance to spend time with her (instead of doing 8 hours today, I'm doing 4 and 4 tomorrow), which I haven't been able to do since June.
She's just a lovely woman. The truth is that she does this for me, but she would do it for anyone who needed her. I'm not going to say she was a perfect mom, because she wasn't, but when I think of the sort of relationship I hope to have with my kids, it's what I have with my mom - open, friendly, loving, supportive and long-lasting.