Tuesday, August 25, 2009

My son was born last night.

I'm not up to much right now. I started having preterm labor and finally went to L&D.

Gabriel Ross was born alive a little before 8 pm. He lived a short while and passed away in our arms. We spent about three hours holding him and telling him how much we loved him.

I was discharged from the hospital today and am home again. I feel empty.

97 comments:

That Chick Over There said...

My heart is broken for you. Love you and love you and love you and if you need anything at all, please do not hesitate to call. Even if you just want to talk. Or scream. Or anything. I am hear for you. You don't deserve this and I am so, so sad for you.

Rachel said...

Eas, I am so, so very sorry. I can't believe this, and I wish there were anything I could say that would make even a dent in how you must be feeling.

The Washer said...

E & J, I am just crying here, I am so very sorry for your loss. If there is anything, and I mean anything, I can do for you, PLEASE ask. I can be there in about 3 hrs if you need someone/something, seriously.

Stephanie said...

Oh Eas, I am so so sorry. I don't have words to express how heartbroken I am for you. I am sending you my love and thoughts. I wish you peace and comfort through this terrible time.

Laura said...

I am so, so sorry. I don't have the words to express how sorry I am. I will be thinking of you and your family.
Love,
Alex17

Keith & Mandi said...

Love. That's all I have. Lots of love. Gabe was lucky to have a mom like you.

MooMooKITTEN of Death said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Please if you need anything just know that you have more people than you know who care about you.

MSC from GP said...

I am so, so, unbelievably sorry for your loss.

Jay said...

I am so very sorry. I wish there was more I could say. My prayer is for peace and rest for you and your husband.

LDRN said...

Easerj:
I am sooooo soooo sorry for your loss. ::Hugs::

Mrs. Jenna said...

Eas - I am SO SORRY. My heart goes out to you and your husband. Words cannot express how sad I am for you!

Lots of love, hugs, thoughts and prayers...

queenrandom said...

I love you hon.

Nlvaden said...

Oh my gosh. I am so sorry. What is going on around here??? I cant believe it.

ManderRae said...

I am so sorry. You are in my thoughts and prayers as you grieve.

Serendipite said...

(((HUGS)))

kim said...

Oh my gosh. I am so sorry. (((hugs)))

pmarie33 said...

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. Take care of yourself. ((hugs))

Callie said...

I am so sorry. I wish I knew the words to say to make this ok but there are none. I wish you nothing but the best.

Schwandy said...

I am so very, very sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you, your H and the rest of your family. I wish you comfort during this awful time.

Danse said...

Words cannot express how sorry I am for your loss. My thoughts are with you and your family.

JL said...

I am so sorry Eas. I am heartbroken for you. Sending all my thoughts and prayers your way. {{{Hugs}}}

-Jen

Rachel and Brett said...

Eas words cannot express how sorry I am for your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers and thoughts.

Rachi

shotzie said...

Oh Eas, I'm so so sorry. I wish there was something I could do or say...my heart is broken for you guys. I'm sending huge hugs to you and I pray for comfort for you and your DH.

Molly said...

OMG, I am so so sorry. There's nothing I can say. Peace for you.

The Mama said...

I am so very sorry. I wish there was more I could say, but I know nothing will help the pain right now. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Susan K said...

NO!! I'm so, so sorry. :( No one should have to go through what you've been through. Ever. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

Terri said...

I wish that I had something comforting to say. I am so incredibly sorry about the loss of your son. :( ((HUGS))


Mrs.tlcS

Katie said...

Easjer,

I have no words. I've been reading your blog for longer than I can imagine and this was the last thing I expected. Please know that you are in my thoughts and my prayers. And Gabriel was quite lucky to have you as a mom.

Love,
Ms.Figgie

Kristen said...

Oh God, Eas, I am so, so, so sorry. I am heartbroken for you and your husband. I'm thinking of you.

Angela said...

I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Super Treesa said...

Oh my. I'm so sorry. I have followed your pregnancy so closely. I want you to know how much my heart aches for you and your family.

mandie lane said...

I am so saddened by your loss. I only "know" you from the Nest, but I wanted to say that my heart hurts for you today.

Heather said...

Love you, babe.

Melanie said...

I am so sorry. I will say many prayers for you and your family.

jess said...

I am so, so very sorry for your loss. I wish that I had more comforting words, but I can't wrap my head around what you might want to hear. I'm sending all of the love I have your way, and I'm always an email/phone call away if there's anything that I can do.

Loretta said...

Eas, I am so, so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how you are feeling. You and your husband will be in my prayers.

canamrelations said...

Eas, I'm so, so incredibly sorry for your loss. I'm thinking of you.
-QC

~Jess said...

Eas, I have no words that could even come close to comforting you, but I want you to know I'm thinking of you and your family. I'm so very, very sorry for your loss ~jessis62781

Amy said...

My heart is breaking for you. I pray that you find peace. I wished there was something more than praying that I could do for you.

So sad. No one deserves this, espcially you.

admin said...

I'm absolutely sickened by this news. I just .. I just cannot understand this and I'm so incredibly sorry and so upset and so saddened. You've been in my thoughts for some time now and will continue to be. I'm just so sorry. -kmtfu

m said...

i am so very, very sorry for your loss. my thoughts are with you and your husband right now.

(bw07 from the nest)

moroccojade said...

Dearest friend. I am so so sorry. This is horrible. My heart is broken. I can't even think straight today. You know I'm here for you - night or day - whatever you need, you've got it. I wish I wasn't so far away. :(

I love you very much. So very much. Thinking of you, J, and your precious son.

MrsO1111 said...

((((hugs))))

Jen Wargo said...

My heart is breaking for you and your husband, reading this was a shock and I'm sending out as many prayers and good thoughts for you as I possibly can.

Ibis said...

I'm so very sad to hear this - I just have no words. My heart goes out to you and your husband.

gallerygirl said...

There are no words. I'm devastated for you and your husband. I'm so sorry your little boy is no longer with you.

Buckin said...

Words can not express how sorry I am right now and how much my heart breaks for you but I know its not even close to what you are feeling.

I am praying for you and your family. I'm so very sorry Eas.

squarepeg said...

I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am. You are in my thoughts.
-epphd

Jessica Loves Trevor (JLT) said...

Oh Eas, my heart is breaking for you. I will keep you and your husband in my thoughts and prayers. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.

Tena said...

Oh my god, I am so sorry. I have been praying and hoping for you, my heart is breaking for you right now. (hug).

Alyssa said...

Oh my gosh. I am so sorry. I saw your blog title, and thought it must be a mistake!

Rebecca said...

I am so sorry for your loss, Eas... I'm crying for you. I will keep you and your husband in my prayers. I know that nothing I can say right now will comfort you but I wanted you to know that I am thinking of you.

outofcntrl82 said...

I am so so sorry for your loss. My heart is broken for you. I wish you strength and comfort during this time.

cour10e said...

I'm so, so sorry. I have followed your blog since my first loss in October but I just saw a post about this on SAL. There are no words that can come close to saying how deeply sorry I am about the loss of your Gabriel. I will pray for strength for you and your husband and that you are surrounded by the love of family and friends in the weeks to come...

Jacqueline said...

I am so terribly sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

charlie1995 said...

I am so sorry for your loss. You and your husband will be in my thought and prayers.

Thusa said...

I am so sorry Eas. We love you and are all praying and thinking of you and your family.

jessica said...

i'm so sorry eas. thinking of you.
-matsifloxacin

shawnandlarissa said...

I am so very, very sorry for your loss
~smilelari~

Caeseria said...

Dear Eas,

I am so very sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine how you are feeling, I only know that I would be heartbroken and crushed and that no words exist beyond that to describe the true depth of my sorrow.
Many prayers, many hugs. May his memory be eternal.
Cecily

Alyssa said...

There are no words good enough, there are no hugs big or warm enough, there is no sentiment strong enough to express my utter sorrow to you and your family. I am so very sorry for the loss of your son, who was undoubtedly as beautiful and special as his mother. Gabriel touched all of our lives, and his legacy will live on in our hearts. We all are here for you, and hope to help in whatever way we can.
So very sorry. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
*Isha

Samantha Marie said...

I've been reading your blog for awhile, and I can't tell you how sorry I am for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with your and your husband.

Susan said...

i don't even know what to say. just know that you have a lot of people out there who care about you; you are in my constant prayers. i'm so very sorry.

B said...

I am so incredibly saddened to hear this. I have followed your story on the Nest and on your blog and my heart aches for you right now. You and your family and your precious Gabriel are in my prayers.
(txbabs111)

Meg 'n' Eric said...

Know that there are a lot of girls on the boards who love you and are praying for you. I am so sorry for your loss Eas, I wish there was more I could do to help. Hugs.

Lucky said...

I am so sorry... I am praying for your family.

P said...

I am crying with you right now. I am so, so sorry.

Mrs. D said...

I am so, so sorry for your loss, and my heart has been crumbling all afternoon thinking about you. I have no words, except please know that you have with you the thoughts and prayers of dozens of women, many of whom you've never even met, but all of whom love you, your husband, and your precious son. The pain will never go away, but I pray that you will be able to find comfort and peace.

AJ said...

Eas, I'm so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you, your husband, little Gabriel, and the rest of your family. Take care of yourself.

Abigail said...

I want you to know that there are so many people out there tonight - all across the country - that are thinking and praying and crying for you tonight. I know that grieving is a lonely process but please remember that you are cared for by many.

Diana said...

I am so very, very sorry for your loss. I'm sure words offer very little comfort at this time but I wish you and your husband peace.

Sara said...

I'm so so sorry (calhoun)

Lore B said...

Oh, hun, I'm SO sorry for your loss!! My heart breaks for you. I hope you can find your way back from this with all the love that surrounds you, and that strength that characterizes you. Much love, Eas, I'll be praying for you, your DH and precious Gabriel.

Gelato54 said...

I've followed your blog from the bump and I'm so so sorry you have to go through this. I'm praying for your family. I wish you peace.

koyn said...

I am so sorry for your losss. My heart breaks for you. You and your husband are in my prayers.

SweetSpikette said...

Eas, I'm so very sorry for your loss. I don't really have any words, but you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Jenn said...

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you lots of prayers and hugs.

Kelly said...

My heart is breaking for you. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. You and your husband are in my prayers.

Kathy said...

I am so sorry for your loss. You and your husband are in my prayers.

Roshelle said...

I am devasted for you. I am so sorry. I will be praying for you and your family.

t.bird said...

i'm so very sorry hon :(

SWMcFarland said...

Eas,

I am so terribly sorry. You and your family and sweet baby boy will be in our prayers today and always.

Sara

sept said...

easjer, i just heard. i'm so incredibly sorry. my heart breaks for you...

gringa78 said...

I'm so, so very sorry for your loss.

Crystal said...

I am so so sorry for your loss.

E_Sharp said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the pain that you are going through, and I hesitate to say anything because I know it will sound hollow, but just know that you are in my thoughts. I wish you strength.

Brad & Rachel said...

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. It breaks my heart, and after all you've been through during this pregnancy. I am keeping you and your husband in my prayers and wish for nothing but peace for the 2 of you.

Typette said...

I'm so sorry about your loss.
Words can not express... I don't know what else to say except my thoughts are with you and your family...

Leenie89 said...

I'm so sorry Easjer. My thoughts are with you and your husband.

rls07 said...

I know this won't take away the heartache but I'm so incredibly sad. My heart is completely broken. (((Hugs))) You are in my thoughts and prayers.

ERG said...

I am so sorry for your loss. It breaks my heart! You, your H, and your family are in my prayers. I wish you peace and comfort through this terrible time. Always in my thoughts.

Jesse and Monica said...

You don't know me at all and I don't know you either. I've been following your blog for nearly a month now. I'm so sad right now for you. I am wordless but know that I'm sorry this had to happen.

CCBanana said...

I'm so sorry.

Rebecca said...

I'm terribly sorry for your loss. I've been thinking of you all day. I am just so sorry. -Becky19

Tonya said...

Oh, Eas, I am so, so sorry. I just don't have the words to express how heartbroken I am for you and your husband.

Never forgetting Gregory said...

I am so very sorry for your loss. I blogged a lot about the suckiness of a preterm labor loss, which may help you if you are interested. This is not fair and there are no answers or explanation as to why this happens. My heart goes out to you and your husband.

Shumpy said...

Eas, I came off botb a long time ago - almost a year - but I never stopped reading your blog. My heart goes out to you at this time of loss and sadness. There's nothing I can say to make the situation more bearable but know I wish you comfort & peace.

Bar07