Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Well, fuck.

Beta is back.

863

Did not double in 4 full days. Fuck.

It's like when you are watching World Series of Poker, and the percentages go up after the deal, then change after the flop and the turn. Well, then, the river card is flipped and the percentage is irrevocably and sometimes dramatically changed and the game is over.

Well, think of this as the turn and the u/s tomorrow afternoon as the river card. The percentages have been changing, it's been flipping, but this turn has pushed the odds heavily back towards ectopic pregnancy.

Much to my chagrin.

I am desparately hoping and even praying that it is simply a blighted ovum or some such other non-viable pregnancy or anything other than an ectopic pregnancy. I am terrified of losing functionality in the left tube (since my right ovary seems to be up awfully high) - not to mention losing the tube.

Please, God, don't do this to me, don't let this happen. Don't take away my chance of having children.

2 comments:

JACQUELYN said...

oh gosh girl...I am sorry you are going through this. I pray that it's not an ectopic pregnancy.

notsosmallfries said...

Oh, honey. I'm praying it isn't ectopic. Praying and praying and praying.

Hugs.