At least on the interwebs.
Actually, I think it's less that I'm getting bitchy and more that I am caring less and less about being nice. More easily irritated might be the polite way to put it. I don't go out of my way to be snarky or mean. I just don't sugar-coat or search for the most politic responses right now.
I mean . . . bloody hell. Use some common freaking sense people. Someone asked about their beta and if anyone could compare. Instead of looking it up on betabase, which I am capable of doing, I gave her the website and advised her to google it. That's not totally bitchy, nor is it totally helpful. Someone asked if their sig was too big, and I responded bluntly, 'Yes. It takes up my entire monitor.' Someone made a flippant comment about being jealous over early u/s and I went through a very thorough explanation about why that jealousy was unwarranted. I was called rude and told I flamed her. Which was sort of funny, because as I read it, it was a firm, but still reserved explanation of the other side of the picture.
Lately there have been complaints about people being more outright rude or mean. I haven't considered myself part of that demographic - I don't call people names, I try to keep to points, and generally participate when I have something to add and not just to insult someone - but it wouldn't surprise me much anymore if others saw it differently.
Oh well . . . that's life on the interwebs, I suppose. I do care about being even keeled and compassionate, but I simply find I haven't got the patience to put up with a lot of stupid these days.
I also find less and less patience for false optimism and hopeful responses to the multitude of posts that seem to be cropping up with January moms as they make their first visits to the doctor. There have been several posts along these lines 'I am supposed to be 8 weeks by LMP and I got a positive test on May 17, but there was no h/b or fetal pole. My doc says I just ovulated late, but that's pretty weird. I can't believe I have to redo three weeks! I'm supposed to go back in 2 weeks and see what's going on.'
While one or two of these may truly be a case of mistaken dates and ridiculously early pregnancy tests . . . most of these are going to be early miscarriages/blighted ovums. Because three weeks after your positive pregnancy test . . . you should see more than just a sac. I don't know whether their doctors are trying to be kind and hopeful or if the patients are not hearing the words of warning or what . . . but there are tons of posts in response that say that the poster must indeed have ovulated or implanted late. Which . . . happens, yes. But the dates add up to bleak pictures. It's all I can do not to go in and say 'Well, that is possible and I wish you the very best and hope you see a fabulous baby and heartbeat in two weeks, but honestly, it's probably a miscarriage, because your dates are all kinds of off.'
Or be blunt with someone who has spotting. I usually want to say, 'Bottom line - about a fourth to a third of all women will experience bleeding or spotting in pregnancy. Half will go on to have healthy pregnancies and babies, the other half will miscarry.' I do say that sometimes, if someone asks clearly for honest advice. But the rest of the time, it's so negative that I am afraid it's unnecessarily insensitive.
I just don't have a lot of patience for blind positivity. I do wish these women well and I hope things work out for them. But I can't bring myself to just rah-rah them with well wishes. I'd rather someone were honest with me, and so I loathe being dishonest. But neither do I wish to cause even more grief or worry . . . so I try to bite my tongue.
Still . . . the filter is being stretched thin.