Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Eh, it's not so bad.

Some Tylenol, some (great) sex, several hours of sleep . . .

Amazing how different the world looks.

And given the ewcm and gaping cervix (how's that image for you? I worked on it for a couple of hours), maybe it really is just hormonal nonsense coupled with crankiness.

Onwards today! Hopefully, it'll be a good one.

* * * * *

And now, I'm back to crappy mood. I want to rip someone's face off. Whether that is just sheer insensitivity that pisses me off or whether that is just a result of wild mood swings and tired crankiness, I can't say.

But I'm extremely irritable now.

Off to check that box on ff.

Oh, and while I have had and seem to be continuing to have a fair amount of clearly ewcm, I found myself thinking today that that isn't unusual for this point, and thinking that maybe nothing will help and I'm doomed to another week of this rollercoaster and had to suppress the urge to burst into tears.

I know the vitex takes time and that I started taking it late. But I am so hopeful it will help that signs of it not helping or working make me feel desperate. I'm sort of hopeful that the lines on the opks (which are early, according to my notes) are a sign that the vitex is in fact increasing lh (sign of it working - the rest sort of dominos from there).

Still. I feel like I would be best represented by being painted in all green and with half-formed sentences and poor pronoun choice - in other words, as a female version of the Hulk. Me Angry! Me Smash Things!

* * * * *

And now, in the evening . . . back to a better mood.

Although I am confused by the opk. The FR was a clear, dark line which made me happy. I thought - ooooo, maybe tomorrow! Then I decided to see how the CBE digital lined up - and it was totally blank. I used a $tree, and it was only the faintest of lines. WTF?

Eh, we'll see tomorrow. We'll have sex tonight, of course, to do what we can. I am still very, very hopeful that I may yet ovulate early. I do now I'll be increasing to 1000 mcg of vitex next month (as the new bottles recommend 1200 mcg, over the 500 I'm currently taking) if this doesn't work this time.

And that is about all there is to say about that.

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