Monday, December 22, 2008

And here we go again.

I feel like I should apologize for the one-track direction and the utter rollercoaster of despair and hope this has been for 4 days (or, you know a week or so). But I won't, because I'm not forcing you to read. You clearly must be getting something out of this, yeah?

Anyhow, tested again tonight, expecting the seemingly inevitable faint line, since hcg would have 12 hours to dissipate.

Instead?

Super dark line. Almost (but not quite) as dark as the control line. Formed in less than a minute (ie, nearly instantly). Is darker than last night's dark test.

The $tree is darker too.

So, I'm still pregnant. Until the next test, I am still pregnant.

I am not bleeding nearly as much. Good sign, that. I feel hopeful once again. Like, hey, we made it to 24 hours after the heaviest bleeding and I'm still getting positives - dark positives. Could it be more dye in this test? Sure.

Does it matter? Not at this moment, not to me. It's still positive. I thought it wouldn't be. I feel hopeful again.

I will take another test in the morning and we'll see what that test says. I am feeling mixed emotions. I'm tired and I'm sort of sick of this ride, but I remain really hopeful that things might yet be ok and my little guy might hang on. I hope. Even against my will, against my logic, I hope. I can feel it inside, deep down, and it begins to warm me up a little.

1 comment:

Mrs. MooMoo said...

Oooh a dark line and fast. That is great! Moooore baby dust **************