What a crazy day.
One friend unexpectedly learns she is pregnant (and is local! and would be due 6 days ahead of me if this baby 'sticks' and if I am pregnant now).
Another friend suffers an early loss.
I am elated and heartbroken. I am thrilled and angry. I am apprehensive about my own situation of waiting, waiting, waiting and fear disappointment. It would be too perfect, wouldn't it? That thought is haunting me now. Immediately after a miscarriage, at the same time as one of my few local girlfriends? Where I was happy and excited earlier, that is now tempered with anxiety setting in - that this isn't real, that this is a fluke of the chart, that if it is real, it will not be a healthy, growing baby.
All I can do is hope and pray, and I find both of those difficult.
Besides, I do not need the prayers, really. My friends do. Say a little one for them - one for a baby that grows, and one for comfort and hope.
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